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  • Guy in my class on the topic of the school trip: Wait. There's only two beds per room? Whoa. No way. I am not sleeping with one of you. I'm not, like, gay or something. Cant we just pay for another room? Like, I'm not gay.
  • His friend: Dude just because we're sharing a bed doesn't mean you're gonna be waking up to a fresh cup of my dick up your ass

mishasminions:

I CANNOT

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highgaarden:

in-sepiatones:

talking to people about my obsessions pretending im just a casual fan

#conceal don’t feel


clientsfromhell:

Me: “What browser are you on?”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “Google Chrome?”

Client: “No, just regular Google.”

Me: “That’s the site. I want to know the browser.”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “No.”

Client: “Look, we can have this conversation forever, man. But when I hit the internet logo, Google comes up!”

Me: “Okay…What does that “internet logo” look like?

Client: “…A fiery fox, I guess. But that’s irrelevant.”


superwhollock:

When Mark moved his chair from the rest of the cast cause he was sick of their shit



asktoothless:

dragonwriter315:

asktoothless:

I’m not saying I want to be a dragon.

but if the opportunity came up to have wings and a tail implanted along with the ability to breathe fire, I’d take it.

Would there be a waiting list for this procedure?

The waiting list is made up of all the notes on this post in order so reblog quickly and save your spot in line.


onamelancholyhill:

mortalcolddecay:

cat-adores-loki:

underhill-of-bree:

cutie pie

i just have to reblog the politest dwarf of them all when its on my dash.

one cannot simply not reblog this. 

Bilbo is like: I don’t have time for your shit, Ori.


girlwithalessonplan:

midwestmumblings:

Amazeballs

NAILED IT.

quixotic-fallen-angel:

carry-on-my-wayward-ass-kicker:

the—fandom—has—claimed—me:

merlinsbearditsthedoctor:

basedgosh:

HELLO BOYS YOU ARE ALLOWED TO BE SAD IF THE GIRL YOU LIKE DOESNT LIKE YOU BACK
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL HER A WHORE/SLUT/PRUDE BITCH ETC AND THINK YOURE ENTITLED TO HER NETHER REGIONS

I started to read that in Crowley’s voice but as I got further on it slowly turned into Thor.

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Now I’m imagining Crowley and Thor going around defending people from douchebags and rapists, making the world a better place.